Movie: Transformers; Rise of the Beasts (2023) Caution Spoiler Alert

 Transformers: Rise of the Beasts

Came out; 2023

Time; 2 hours 7 minutes

Watched: Amazon

Rated: PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi action, violence and language

IMDB Rating; 6.1/10

Caution; Spoiler Alert

Staring;

Anthony Ramos as Noah Diaz

Dominique Fishback as Elena Wallace

Peter Cullen as Optimus Prime (Voice)

Ron Perlman as Optimus Primal (Voice)

Peter Dinklage as Scourge (Voice)

Michelle Yeoh as Airazor (Voice)

Pete Davidson as Mirage (Voice)

Liza Koshy as Arcee (Voice)

Story Line;

Returning to the action and spectacle that have captured moviegoers around the world, Transformers: Rise of the Beasts will take audiences on a '90s globetrotting adventure with the Autobots and introduce a whole new faction of Transformers - the Maximals - to join them as allies in the existing battle for earth. Directed by Steven Caple Jr. and starring Anthony Ramos and Dominique Fishback

Thoughts:

Unless you're the type to get high and watch movies, don't watch this. Or watch it for the effects which are still pretty amazing. The story line is non-existant and the acting is sub-par.

Really, I was bored out of my mind watching this and I was begged to. I can't even pretend this was decent because it wasn't

Scourge is a character from Thor: Ragnarok and he looks like Ultron, coincidence, I doubt it. Oh and somehow at the end there is a tie in to G.I. Joe.

You have been warned to not watch this!

CAUTION; Major Spoiler Alert

The film starts on the planet of the Maximals, where the maniacal Transformer god Unicron (Colman Domingo) is preparing to make his descent and consume the planet for power. Unicron sends his minions, the Terrorcons, led by Scourge (Peter Dinklage), to retrieve for him the Transwarp Key, which would give Unicron the power to access unlimited worlds to consume. The Maximals - Apelinq (David Sobolov), Primal (Ron Perlman), Airazor (Michelle Yeoh), Rhinox (also David Sobolov), and Cheetor (Tongayi Chirisa) - prepare their leave from the planet, but Apelinq stays behind to fight back while bestowing Primal with the name "Optimus Primal". Scourge, a trophy hunter, arrives and battles Apelinq alongside his Freezer drones. While Apelinq demolishes the Freezers, Scourge mortally wounds Apelinq but realizes too late that the Maximals have already escaped with the key. Unicron then proceeds to devour the planet.

1994, Brooklyn - Former soldier/electronics expert Noah Diaz (Anthony Ramos) lives with his mother Breanna (Luna Lauren Velez) and little brother Kris (Dean Scott Vasquez). Kris suffers from a sickness, and the family is struggling to earn money for his medication. Noah goes to the hospital and has no insurance for his brother to get help, and when he goes in for a job interview, he is told by the manager of the company that he has canceled the interview after speaking to Noah's former commanding officer, who says he is brave but cannot work in a team.

Elena Wallace (Dominique Fishback) works as an intern for a snooty gallery owner named Jillian (Sarah Stiles). Detectives are at the workplace because an art director got busted and might have been keeping fakes. Elena confirms for Jillian what is authentic and what is fake, but Jillian takes credit for the findings. Elena then finds a statuette resembling Airazor, complete with the Transformers insignia etched onto it. Jillian thinks it's ancient Sumerian but Elena does her research.

Noah goes to his friend Reek (Tobe Nwigwe), who convinces him to steal a Porsche being kept in the garage of another company so that he can sell it. Noah manages to sneak in and finds the Porsche, breaking into it. At the same time, Elena uses a device to look further into the statuette, but ends up breaking it and finding part of the Transwarp Key inside. This sends out a signal that awakens the Autobots, and Optimus Prime (Peter Cullen) calls upon Bumblebee, Arcee (Liza Koshy), and Mirage (Pete Davidson), the latter being the car that Noah is currently inside. A security guard catches Noah, which prompts Mirage to start driving himself out of there. A chase across the city ensues, where Noah realizes the car is driving itself. As the cops get closer, Mirage demonstrates his powers by creating illusions of himself to distract the cops, allowing him and Noah to get away.

Mirage brings Noah to a facility where he morphs into his Autobot form, which freaks Noah out. Optimus and Arcee are none too pleased to find a human among them, but Bee is more trusting, and Mirage thinks Noah is fine. Optimus mentions that the key has sent out a signal and that they need to go after it so they can return to Cybertron. Noah joins Mirage as they make their way toward the art museum to get the key, but Scourge and his Terrorcon cronies Battletrap (also David Sobolov) and Nightbird (Michaela Jae Rodriguez) are already on Earth and are going after the key as well.

Noah enters the museum and startles Elena, who thinks he's an intruder. After a struggle, Noah tries to explain that he needs the key (which Elena still doesn't know that's what she's holding), and Elena only believes him when Scourge blasts a hole through the wall and kills a security guard. As the Terrorcons attempt to attack, the Autobots show up for battle. While Optimus and Bumblebee attempt to go after Scourge, the deadly Terrorcon impales Bee and blasts him in the chest, killing him while Optimus can only watch in horror. Before Scourge can take Optimus too, Airazor flies in and drives Scourge and the others away, though he has taken the key half with him.

Scourge returns to Unicron and discovers that it's only half of the key, which makes the god violently punish his disciple. Airazor explains the situation to the Autobots (plus Noah and Elena), and Elena determines that the other half of the key must be in Peru, based on the readings she looked up. Before leaving, Noah returns home to see Kris, but Mirage shows up and makes his presence obvious. Noah explains his mission to Kris and tells Mirage to promise to keep his brother safe.

To get to Peru, the gang travels inside Stratosphere (John DiMaggio), an Autobot that morphs into a rickety old plane. On the way, Noah tells Elena that they should destroy the key to prevent Unicron's arrival, even if it means the Autobots will be stuck on Earth. Once they arrive, they meet with a local Autobot named Wheeljack (Cristo Fernandez) who guides them to their location. Mirage also gives Noah a device that wraps around his wrist in case he needs to defend himself.

Noah and Elena enter an underground cavern after finding Transformers symbols and make their way down. Unfortunately, the Terrorcons have arrived as well, and Scourge sends more Freezers to go after Noah and Elena. The two find a crypt where the key ought to be, but find it empty except for some inscriptions that Elena writes down. When they are spotted, they make a run for it, and the Autobots follow. During the chase, Optimus vows revenge for Bumblebee by trying to go after Scourge, while the others take on Battletrap and Nightbird. Airazor joins the fight but she gets marked by Scourge with one of his weapons. The others just barely escape.

Noah and Elena exit the caverns and end up in a jungle where they are confronted by Primal and the other Maximals. The Autobots show up to defend the humans until Airazor tells Primal that they are allies. He tells the others that he and the Maximals moved the other key half away to keep it safe. The Maximals guide everyone to a nearby village that they protect and share an alliance with the humans that live there, as they are the ones keeping the other key half safe. Later, Primal shows Optimus raw energy that can be used to revive Bee, but it requires a large surge of energy. Meanwhile, Elena tells Noah maybe they shouldn't destroy the key and compares him to Optimus, as they are both big brothers looking out for their families.

In the morning, Airazor has become fully corrupted by the dark energy that Scourge infected her with. She begins to attack until the other Maximals try to subdue her. Primal tries to hold her down, but Airazor tells him to do what he has to do, so he squeezes her until she breaks down and dies. Noah also seizes an opportunity to destroy the key with the wrist device, but Optimus pleads with him not to do so until he relents. Unfortunately, this gives Scourge an opportunity to seize the key and make his way back to Unicron.

Scourge and the Terrorcons fuse both halves of the key together and create a platform over a volcano to summon Unicron. After Optimus and Noah realize their actions have made things worse, the Autobots and Maximals (and Noah and Elena) join forces to stop the villains once and for all. Elena uses the markings she found to come up with a code that can disable the key. The heroes then charge into battle, with Primal commanding Rhinox and Cheetor to morph into their Transformers bodies to fight against the incoming horde of Scorponoks. Mirage helps Noah and Elena find an entry point to get up to the platform to enter the code. Optimus and Primal then team up with rip Battletrap apart before Primal smashes his head with his own wrecking ball.

Unicron starts getting closer to Earth, with his presence reaching other cities like back in New York. When Noah gets closer, Scourge attempts to kill him, but Mirage uses his body to shield Noah before he is also killed. However, Mirage is able to transfer part of his body to the wrist device to create a suit for Noah to utilize in battle after hearing Kris talking to him over Mirage's radio. The energy waves from the key also manage to charge the energy, bringing Bee back to life. He enters the battle and proceeds to help turn things around, including him flying into the sky with Nightbird and tearing her to pieces. Optimus battles Scourge, nearly winning until Scourge blasts the computer being used for Elena to enter the key, rendering it useless. Optimus dismembers Scourge before ripping his head off and then resolving to destroy the key himself to prevent Unicron from getting closer. The key explodes, causing a vortex that sends Unicron away but nearly pulls Optimus with it until Primal and Noah help pull him back.

While Unicron may still be out there, the Autobots and Maximals acknowledge their victory and part ways. Noah and Elena fly home in Stratosphere, and he returns home to Kris and their mom.

Later on, Noah is up for another job interview. He meets a man named Agent Burke (Michael Kelly), who knows about Noah being in Peru and working with the Autobots, though Noah tries to deny it. Burke offers Noah a chance to join a secret government organization, even guaranteeing that Kris's medical expenses will be covered. Noah is incredibly thankful and watches as Burke enters a secret room filled with vehicles, gadgets, and other top secret things. Noah then looks at Burke's business card and learns the name of the organization - G.I. JOE.

During the credits, Noah is with Reek as he is fixing up Mirage. Reek thinks it's pointless until Noah calls upon Mirage to turn on, and the Autobot comes back to life proudly.